Sunday, May 10, 2009
{ 12:36 AM }
Many things are still left unsaid.
Unbelievable, sme muthafucker just came and made misery and left
Its super not believable. Its still hard to believe.Pain is Pain. It will nvr leave. The scar is always there. It can nvr be removed. It hurts big tyme.
God pls be merciful to me, i did many mistakes in the past. But now ive realised it. I promise it wont happen anymore. Pls forgive me and let my family be happy. Im the cause for the misery in my house.
I feel like crying out loud. And pls punish that bastard. He promised me love, and cheated me. I HATE HIM.
my heart is always heavy. I only haf this blog to talk to. Its my partner.
Its mother's day, im not fit to wish my mum. I din wish her. Im bad. She has her other children, dey will do her proud. im just a jinx.
I try to be happy but within 10 days, im onli happy for a day. I wasnt happy even wen i turned 20. Not impt. The day i was born wasn impt. my smile and laughter is always fake, nvr i smiled genuienly. LOVE IS PAIN.
Now i got a company, male companion. But i dont think i will ever fall in love with anyone. I dun wish to either. its painful and i dun wan to disgrace my family anymore. everyone noes abt my shame.
GOD pls give me the strength to carry on living. I dun wish to get married either, why cheat a poor man. after all im a second hand material. Who would want me??
All this sucks, i shldn haf brought this upon myself. im still trying to perk up and carry on. its hard, bt i will fight tru this.
HE is happy over there, while here im struggling.
GOD if i ever get married, pls make me infertile. Im nt fit to be a mother, after hurting my mom so much. i dun deserve all this.